The Boys' First Three Weeks

The boys were born on a Tuesday and came home on a Tuesday, three weeks later!

What an emotional time for both Jonathan and me! We were very thankful for all the family that came to be with us when the boys arrived, but this is about the way I was feeling throughout the time my boys were in the NICU.

September 1, 2010 - Neither of the boys could keep their oxygen levels at a sufficient level and they were both put on the ventilators. Even on the vent, Jacob had low oxygenation so they determined that a venous line was necessary so they wouldn’t have to keep sticking his foot to test his levels. What a heartbreaking sight, to see your child with a line going in through where his belly button should be. I was still having a hard time getting around and I had to be wheeled to the NICU to see the boys, but as the day went on I started walking a little and was able to stand without fear of falling. My ability to stand meant I could stand next to their beds and place my hand on each of them. First contact with my boys!!

September 2, 2010 – I changed Jacob’s diaper for the first time. I was ecstatic to have that contact with him and also saddened that my child was 2 days old and I had not even had the small pleasure of changing his diaper. To this point the best I could hope for was to lay my hand on one of the boys while they were sleeping, we were not allowed to rub the boys because that sensation would have disturbed them. The time I had with the boys was regulated by their “touch times,” so I could not go anytime I wanted to see them, I had to wait until the hours of 5, 8, 11, or 2. While I was in the hospital, I didn’t miss a touch time, not even the 2 am time. Both of the boys came off the ventilators that evening and they would spend the next 5-6 days weaning them off the CPAP machine. (I am far from a medical professional, but my understanding of this machine is that it forces air down into their lungs so they don’t have to work as hard to breath, but there was no tube down into their lungs.)



Me holding Jacob before his bath.

September 3, 2010 – Every small thing that other mothers might take for granted was a huge step for me! Today was the first time I held Jacob in my hands. It was for his first bath. I didn’t get to snuggle him, but I had both of my hands under him. Today was also the first time I got to change my Caleb. I was starting to feel like a mother, finally!

Caleb with his "cool" sunglasses.

September 4, 2010 – Today we found out that both of the boys were jaundice. They both spent the day in phototherapy and got to wear cool little sunglasses. Today was the first day I actually held Caleb in my arms. Waiting 4 days to hold my child was very hard on me, but it was so wonderful to have that time with him. To be able to look down at my child the way a mother is intended (of course it would have been better without all the cords and IV’s).

September 5, 2010 – This day was especially hard for me. I had been discharged from the hospital the day before, but since the boys were still there in the NICU, I was allowed to stay for an additional night. They called it lodging, but could only allow me to do this for one night. I stayed for the 5 pm “touch time” and then came home. I cried so hard when Jonathan brought me home that night. CJ, Sandhya and Chad were all at the house and CJ and Sandhya had prepared a wonderful lasagna and salad and garlic bread. The house was full, but empty of the two people that should have been there!

I spent the next two weeks going back and forth from the house to the hospital. I didn’t go for every “touch time” because it was just too much back and forth while I was trying to pump. These two weeks held ups and downs and Jonathan and I rejoiced with every small step each boy took forward, but we also had moments of extreme sadness when the boys were not progressing the way the doctors hoped. We also had a bad experience with a nurse. To keep the story short; she ripped tape from Jacob’s face, he screamed, and that little blonde nurse is lucky I couldn’t reach her ponytail because I would have yanked it off her head!

By September 9th, both boys were completely off any oxygen. Now the boys had to learn how to take 8 bottles a day. While they were on oxygen, they had been tube fed so any instinct to suck had been lost. On September 18th, we walked in to see the boys and there was no tube going down their noses anymore! It was so amazing to see my boys’ faces with no tape or tubes, just their perfectly beautiful faces! Three long days later, September 21st, we finally got to bring the boys home! I can touch them whenever I want and hold them without turning off a machine. They were finally mine!



On our way home!!